Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Random Review: Sunday paper comics

My time my not be the most precious in the world, but any part of my day where I can save a couple of seconds is important. The Sunday paper is big of full of news, all of it depressing, there are lots of ads showing you crap you don't need or can't afford and most of the time, the deals aren't even good.

However, there's that one bright colorful section in the middle of that giant heap of paper, the Sunday comics. It's reliable and always there despite being unable to contain anything that would surpass Cavlin & Hobbes. Since I've got nothing better to do, 'll give them a shot anyway. but is it worth your precious seconds to read? I'll make the decision for you below with all the comics listed and reviewed chronologicallyr:

Hi & Lois - Eh, entertaining enough I guess, worth a read sometimes.
Classic Peanuts -
Good ol' Charlie Brown, Lucy's still a bitch though, nothing new, but it's a classic and worth reading.
For Better or Worse -
Not as interesting as it used to be, sometimes the read will be worth it.
Prince Valiant -
Never cared for it, but I'm sure it's got a decent fanbase.
The Family Circus -
The most insipid crap in the world. Today the kids hit z repeatedly on the keyboard and said "you get a whole line of sleep", which I'm sure is slang for blow. I hate this comic, but every single time I read it and I don't know why, probably the same reason we're drawn to train-wrecks.
The Lockhorns -
Reminds me of better times (read: Married With Children) and it's more enjoyable because I'm not married. I read it most of the time, but I don't care at all if I missed reading it one week.
Shoe -
Pretty good most of the time, but not one I care to read often.
Cathy -
Beetle Baily -
Sometimes when I'm in the mood to see a skinny guy getting the crap beaten out of him.
Hagar the Horrible -
Vikings with marital problems rock.
Garfield -
We all know it hasn't been good in more than 10 years. At its peak, there was a surprisingly watchable cartoon show. I'll usually read it, but I'm disappointed the vast majority of the time.
Slylock Fox -
Proof that jail isn't a deterrent and isn't about rehab. Slick Smitty and Shady Shrew need to be locked up for good.
Get Fuzzy -
I hate this because it replaced Close to Home. Aside from a couple occasions, it's a waste of time.
Mallard Fillmore -
A political duck is just plain intriguing. Read it most of the time, satisfied enough to not hate it.
Rose is Rose -
I think this has the blasphemous honor of having actually replaced Calvin & Hobbes in my paper, it's pretty crappy too.
One Big Happy -
One big waste of time. Very rarely is there a good one.
Jump Start -
Used to be readable, now it's just shitty.
Non Sequitur -
Pretty good most of the time, worth a read.
Zits -
Pesky teenagers and their wacky antics, but at the least the comic is good.
The Wizard of Id -
Meh, easily forgettable, occasionally I'll read it..
Baby Blues -
Whenever they run out of ideas, she seems to have another kid, I think they're up to 17 now. Pretty good, but not great.
Blondie -
Any comic that can stay enjoyable all this time is worth something, plus Blondie's a real woman, just look at her save Dagwood from phishers and then tell him to get back to bed, yowza, pretty hot for the comics section.
Dilbert -
Easily the best comic out of the bunch, the TV show rocked too. Makes me laugh most of the time.

So there you have it, most comics are average and there are a few terrible ones and only a couple good ones.

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